• Victoria Baxter

Battling Loneliness

Loneliness. Something that affects many people. Singles get frustrated because they have no one to share life with. Whether it's lack of romantic relationships/interest, no friends, being alone in a different city or state, or just feeling isolated, it plagues many. There's a difference between loneliness and alone. Loneliness is the sadness that exists because one doesn't have anyone (friends, company, a partner, etc). Alone is simply having no one present. As a single, you can either be alone or lonely. Huge difference.


Loneliness Blues

That one word really stands out: sadness. It's a feeling of emptiness, unhappiness, misery, or dejection, because you have no one else to do life with. It leads to depression in many cases, bringing on a case of the Loneliness Blues. I believe it would be easier for some to deal with if they at least had other things, or people, to look forward to. They must find things that will eliminate the sadness and give them a reason to smile. But it's keeping in mind that happiness is a choice. It's an inside job, a one-person job. No one else can make you happy. No one else is allowed to bring or give you happiness. Because that would mean that person is also capable of taking it away.


How to overcome loneliness

There are many things one can do to battle and overcome loneliness. First, it's changing your mindset. You may be alone, or single, but it doesn't mean you have to be lonely. It doesn't have to equate to a melancholy state. Choose to be happy! Remember that as a believer, your joy comes from the Lord. That's first and foremost. When anxiety is great within you, His consolation will bring joy to your soul (Psalm 94:19). Keep in mind that there is a difference between happiness and joy. Happiness is an emotion. It ranges and varies, often based upon the current circumstances or situation. Joy is a deeper and stronger form of happiness. Sadly enough, though, it's less common. It's something that most people don't experience. In a survey done in 2017, 33% of Americans said they were happy. Interestingly enough, the people who reported being the happiest were men and women in high-income households and those with a high school diploma or less. All circumstantial. There are ways to overcome loneliness, and take a posture of joy.


  • Foster good relationships.* Surround yourself with family and friends that you enjoy being around. If the number is low or non-existent, it's time to meet new people!

  • Have an attitude of gratitude.* Giving thanks and being grateful boost your overall sense of joy.

  • Be generous.* Give and serve others out of the kindness of your heart. Especially those that can never repay you.

  • Get more rest.* It's amazing what sleep can do for a person.

  • Be optimistic. Have hope and wait expectantly. You never know what God is up to behind the scenes.

  • Get physical*. And by that I mean exercise. Exercising at least once a week or even 10 minutes a day is linked to happiness.

  • Set goals. Set them and write the vision. Work towards your goals everyday.

  • Even when trials come, count it all joy. Endure and fight from a place of victory, knowing you've already won.

  • Plan a trip. And get this. Studies show that even if you don't take the trip, the planning phase* brings a spike of happiness.

Being alone doesn't mean you have to be lonely. Surround yourself with good people. Do things for yourself. Live out loud on purpose. Don't simply exist. Doing these things listed will bring on happiness. But overall, you'll find yourself joyful as you deliberately do things that put you at ease.


For single ladies trying to find contentment, click here

Those with an asterisk (*) indicate that they've been scientifically proven and linked to cheerfulness within a person

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